This word represents one of the key elements that binds a relationship together.  Without it there wouldn't be a relationship at all.  It would be a constant battle to get along, full of secret text checking  and e-mail inspecting. Seeing how many other women have been added to their friends list on facebook.  Why do we put ourselves through it, if we are constantly living in fear that our other half is being unfaithful?  Well, my theory is that love will set you free, but so will the truth.

 

Since I was old enough to know about strip clubs, lap dancers and even those men's magazine's full of air brushed pictures of naked women that just eat away at your self esteem, I've always been very aware that it is just too easy for your other half to be lead astray.  But most recently my fears have been abruptly confronted by reality.

 

My fiancé's brother is getting married next year and he is the best man. This means that he has the delightful (to him) task of arranging the stag do.  To me this is hell! They have already planned to go abroad and get completely wasted which will no doubt lead them to stumble across one of these notorious clubs.  I am now faced with the grim certainty that my fiancé will not only see these infamous women in the flesh but will be willing to pay for their services for himself.

 

I am not naïve.  I know that he has probably encountered one of these places before, and I am very aware of what happens at these customary stag do's.  But I think a level of mutual respect should be maintained.  Why should I consent my fiancé to do this?  I am a woman and I have feelings and they will most certainly be hurt if I find out he has flippantly taken part in this male bonding celebration.  I just don't understand how any woman could not bat an eye lid at the thought of their partner with a naked woman draped all over him.

 

 

 

 

I suppose that if you truly have trust in your relationship, then this kind of thing would not even enter your mind.  Yes, he may well attend the party, but a loving trustworthy boyfriend only has eyes for you, and if it's alright for him to look, then so can you. I understand that when it comes to these stag do's, he is going to see naked women, but it doesn't mean he has to let them dance all over him. 

 

Maybe, it's just me.  My low self esteem has chipped away at my trust for my boyfriend, and now I have flashing images of him with a Polish Stripper.  Is this normal?  Am I just a little bit possessive, or are these feelings standard, because the trust we once had is no longer there.  I suppose I'll have to wait and see until the outrageous event arrives next year.  

 

 

 Stefanie Langdon-Griffiths